Candy Rant

"I killed a rat with a stick once."

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Nonviolence

Here is another of my favorite tidbits from the college freshman writing assignment entitled "Who Do You Wish Would Just Shut Up and Why":

"Like I said, I am NOT a mean person. In fact, I am a VERY nonviolent person, but I would like to tear his balls off, so that he has to live without them for the rest of his days. He's so RACIST! And he's half-Mexican! F*ck him!"

13 Comments:

  • At 8:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Yes, I can tell the writer doesn't have a mean or violent bone in his or her body. It's so obvious.

    I hope you're packing a stun-gun to class with you each day.

     
  • At 10:47 AM, Blogger Jerry said…

    Well, at least you won't have to teach him to how to express his emotions--unless you want the to sublimate them to a higher purpose. Or, unless you are looking for rational emotionalism. Then you might have an instructional issue.

    But, look at what a great teaching moment this is: "Drop your pencil, and back away from the paper."

    Every good teacher need a stun-gun these days. Not to use, you understand, but to communicate your position on misbehavior.

     
  • At 10:47 AM, Blogger Hoosier Mama said…

    Wow! I didn't know Gandhi was alive and well, and sitting (ever-so-passively, of course) in a community college writing class.

     
  • At 10:56 AM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    HA! You guys are great on a Monday morning. I needed a laugh.

    The writer of this gem is a girl. And the whole paper was like this. The actual main theme was her hatred of what she calls "sl*tty b*tches." I will use asterisks here so I don't get a whole lotta google hits I don't want.

    Jerry, I'm very careful with my stun-gun. I simply use it as an accessory, right next to the 40 oz. can of Mace hanging on my utility belt.

    Ghandi. Yeah. He'd last about 4 minutes in my class. They'd beat him to death.

     
  • At 12:37 PM, Blogger prairie biker said…

    Well, that's another one added to my list of "Girls not to trust to give me fellatio".

     
  • At 12:40 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Oh no! That brings the list to, what...TWO?? And since the other one was Leona Helmsley, it's down to just one again.

     
  • At 7:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'll have you know that I was going through a really ugly break-up when I wrote that paper. But instead of tearing his balls off, I settled for just lacing his Pop Tarts with Ex-Lax. So there! See, I'm really NOT a violent person!

    But I still hate those sl*tty b*tches!

     
  • At 7:52 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Of COURSE you aren't violent, Jackie! Never never never. I simply do not recall a time when you and I stuffed bodies in your trunk together. And the REASON I don't remember is that it never happened. Nosiree.

    But nobody'll miss a few sl*tty b*tches anywho, right?

     
  • At 8:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Damnit! I think somebody put Ex-Lax in my Pop Tarts!

    (gurgle)

    Oh no......uh, I'll be right back.

     
  • At 8:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Wow. That was strange.

    I bought these Pop Tarts from this half-Mexican guy out in front of the Speedway near my house. He was selling them from the trunk of his old Cutlass.

    He seemed kind of racist to me, which I thought odd, since he was half-Mexican and all....but what a deal for Pop Tarts! I couldn't pass it up!

    Oh no.....

     
  • At 9:41 PM, Blogger Steve B said…

    I guess she's never heard of "emotional" violence, eh?

    Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words crush my spirit.

     
  • At 9:50 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Futuresis, It was a CUTLASS! Could there be a more ominous sign?

    Steve, yeah, that's going to be tomorrow's lesson in class. Emotional violence.

     
  • At 1:11 PM, Blogger Citlali said…

    lol. Wow. How can you say this job ain't worth stayin' in? It's SO entertaining??? lol. = ]

     

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