Growth

Since we're on the topic of the hazards of growing old, I'll share with you my mother's take on it:

"All you do when you get old is sit around and grow things you don't need. Tumors, corns, bunyons, bone spurs, cysts, stiff hairs on your chin, moles, lumps, ingrown toenails, bumps on your skin,...did I say moles yet?"

She pauses.

"And then as soon as you go get one thing chopped off, you grow nine more."