Candy Rant

"I killed a rat with a stick once."

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Some People Just Know How to Be Good Parents

In my creative nonfiction writing class, my students are finishing up long essays (15 pages) about an experience they've had. One of my best students, Jon, wrote about the summer he worked at a humane shelter. It's a great essay. I got this email from Jon today:

"Here's one tidbit I didn't include in my piece: as
you might expect, white trash tend to frequent animal shelters, and
my town was no exception. One time this Hell's Angel type came in
WITH HIS KIDS and wearing a black t-shirt that said the following: 'It
ain't gonna suck itself.' I almost shat myself when he walked by me."


  • At 7:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I remember the first time I met my wonderful husband.....from across the room, I noticed his charming smile....his seductive eyes....then I read his t-shirt: It ain't gonna suck itself!

    I knew right then that he was THE ONE.

    I feel so proud when he wears that shirt to parent-teacher conferences. Surely they can see why our children are so gifted!

  • At 4:51 AM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Futuresis, you and your trashy husband are gonna make real good in-laws. You got so much class I have to scratch my armpit every time I think of ya.

  • At 11:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    (Sniff) You're so sweet, Candy! You's gonna fit right into our clan. It's like Scott is marrying his own twin sister!

    Just think--soon, you won't have to scratch your own armpit anymore. He'll be right there by your side to do it for you.

    I must stop now. I'm getting all choked up....

  • At 2:39 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Not sure to whom you're referring, anonymous. It was a guy wearing the T-shirt.

    If that comment was for me or for Futuresis, well, thanks for adding a little Hallmark to our Sunday.

  • At 9:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Oh, lord. Obviously, it couldn't suck itself. If it could suck itself, then there wouldn't be a young spawn running around wearing a T-shirt that says such a thing.

    Jesus, was that more existentialism?

    Um, no. The sig oth just read what I'm typing, and he has spoken. He's right: it's just stupidity begating more stupidity. And somehow, I have become a part of it. OH GOD! More existentialism! Get it off! Get it off!

  • At 8:22 AM, Blogger prairie biker said…

    Aha! Now I know what to get Scott for a wedding present!

  • At 1:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Oh, Candy. Sorry I haven't read in a while. Great stuff as always.

    Wish I had something witty to say.

  • At 6:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Funny that you saw this guy at an "animal" shelter. Instead of kids raising kids, it's animals raising animals.


  • At 8:54 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Welcome back, Belle!!! Glad to see you in Candyland!

    Anonymous...don't insult the animals.


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