Inside the Thoughts of Zygotes
My friend Lori and her almost-4-year-old son Nat take care of my cat, Hankie, while I'm out of town. We like to call it Hankie-Nannying. Lori wrote me this email last night after I got to Phoenix.
"Nat and I were walking over to your house and Nat ran ahead of me and wouldn't stop at first when I called him. So I was lecturing him about the dangers of running too far on a busy road, not minding me, etc, but he didn't seem to care at all until we got to your house and I was unlocking the door. Then he started crying and said 'Please, please stop talking now. I don't want Hankie to hear about this.' His only concern was that Hankie would know he got in trouble! Hankie's new toy took his mind off things, though, and he was very careful walking back."
I love this kid. I love hearing how his brain works.
Today, I spent way too much time out baking by the pool, and when I got hungry I found some fig newtons in Scott's cupboard. I didn't even know he liked fig newtons. The combo of swimming and eating those cookies flashed me back to when I was 9 or 10 and my mom would take me to this old couples' farm to swim in their lake with some other bored-to-death farm kids. I would swim my brains out, as kids do, and when we got home I would eat 2 fig newtons and fall asleep. It was wonderful, exhausted, gone-to-another-planet-don't-bother-leaving-a-note sleep. The kind where you're almost certain that every organ in your body has been put on "pause" like an old Betamax. The kind of sleep you get to have before you're old enough for job interviews and 401-K's and colonoscopies. Occasionally I still get that kind of sleep, mostly after yoga class or immediately after ragingly good sex.
Fig newtons brought back all kinds of memories. Here are some things I used to believe when I was a kid:
1. Those TV ads for furniture stores that said "90 Days Same As Cash!" I thought they were saying "famous cash." I didn't know how you got your hands on famous cash, or how the store would be able to tell it was famous when you got there.
2. There had to be only 365 people on the earth, because there could only be one person for each birthday.
3. All dogs were boys. All cats were girls.
4. When I was about 15 and starting to look up colleges, I would read this:
and I would think that not very many people were able to graduate, and so why would I want to go there?
What did you believe when you were little?