Candy Rant

"I killed a rat with a stick once."

Saturday, October 13, 2007

A New Favorite

From a freshman paper:

"Unknowingly, every faucet of our lives is influenced by the culture we live in."

18 Comments:

  • At 7:28 PM, Anonymous Scott P said…

    Exquisite.

     
  • At 10:02 PM, Blogger Domhan said…

    How is it your students write these howlers, and my students just mangle the words in a sentence to a frothy green paste?

     
  • At 11:55 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    I have no idea. But I'm thrilled every single time one of them pops up. It's just like finding some treasure hidden in a tree a la Pippi Longstocking.

     
  • At 12:28 AM, Blogger Mel said…

    Heh!

    My faucets must be culturally insignificant. I'm just happy when they don't leak.

     
  • At 10:54 AM, Blogger Jerry said…

    I say collect them all, and write a book entitled "Teaching in a Sir Realistic Wurld," or "The Solution to America's Educational Apocalypse:Motivating with a Taser."

    Or, "Today's Students: Proof of the Need for Birth Control."

    Or, "I Upped Your Child's Education, Now Up Yours."

    Or, "Teenagers Are Humans Too: Why They Respond to Abuse Like the Rest of Us."

    Or, "Today's Students: A Cogent Argument for Euthanasia?"

    But, all kidding aside, remember that the student in your classroom who is interested in learning is probably one at least 5 in America. You have to ask yourself what is his or her problem? Why aren't they out in the parking lot smoking crack with the other kids or doing drive-bys.

    Doncha love teens?

     
  • At 12:02 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Mel, you must strive for more significant faucets.

    Jerry, "Sir Realistic" is perfect. Sounds just like a freshman. You've provided many great titles to choose from!

     
  • At 8:12 PM, Anonymous futuresis said…

    That is so deep. And so true.

    I know for a fact that my faucets in Phoenix were influenced by the culture. In order to get them to operate properly, I had to learn Spanish. It got really old having to say, "Agua fria, por favor....agua caliente, por favor...."

    The only part of your student's statement that I would object to is that this influence occurred unknowingly. It was very obvious to me when we were thirsting for water and my demands, in English, were not being met. I thank my faucets for forcing me to learn some Spanish. That has definitely changed my life.

    Gracias, my dear faucets. I miss you terribly.

     
  • At 8:39 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    You brought tears to my eyes, Futuresis. You with your deep appreciation of your faucets. Sniff.

    Please send me some of what you smoked.

     
  • At 9:13 PM, Anonymous futuresis said…

    I will. Along with an English-to-Spanish dictionary, so that you can also overcome the cultural barrier you have with your plumbing. It is amazing the influence it has on the faucets in your life, isn't it? That is something very few people realize when they move to a new area. I'm glad that your student is getting the word out.

     
  • At 9:15 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    I'll watch for that package in the mail! Along with the drug-sniffing dogs that will accompany it.

    My students, indeed, are prophets.

     
  • At 11:47 AM, Blogger Steve B said…

    eh hmmm.

    "in which we live."

    Duh.

     
  • At 8:46 PM, Blogger mom said…

    I once had a student ask me to write a letter of rec so her could go for his NBA.

     
  • At 8:48 PM, Blogger mom said…

    he he he he who lives in glass houses, should not throw stones. I meant "he" not "her"

     
  • At 8:54 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    HA!!! Was his name LeBron James? Cause I think HE went on for his NBA.

     
  • At 4:39 PM, Blogger Citlali said…

    Futuresis: Wow, que padre que tuviste la oportunidad de hablar espaƱol con las llaves del agua.

    candy rant: I totally understand the resistance to give in to the forced cultural immersion. It drives me nuts that our whole government gives in to the demand of translating everything into a language we don't even acknowledge officially. Any group from any culture should have the courtesy of learning the language of the country they've moved to, no??? ugh.

    IF you ever need help -- with your faucets or otherwise, please feel free to email. lol.

     
  • At 7:02 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Dang! Look! Citlali knows how to talk that furrener language. I think she said "My father the tourist loves the opportunity to fill his water glass with lava." That is so odd, Citlali. He must have terrible esophogeal burning.

     
  • At 8:38 PM, Anonymous futuresis said…

    Actually, I plugged Citlali's furrener phrase into my handy-dandy Spanish-to-English translator, which is always oh so reliable and this is what it said: Wow, that father that you had the opportunity to speak Spanish with the keys of the water.

    I think I understood it better in Spanish.

     
  • At 10:29 AM, Anonymous CraigC said…

    Never mind the dangling adverb.....

     

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