Candy Rant

"I killed a rat with a stick once."

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Birthday Dinner

Scott has gotten me so spoiled that I'm thinking of starting my own country. Where I can dress my cat Hankie in little sweaters knitted of 24 karat gold yarn.

This is the outrageously good dinner he (Scott, not Hankie) made for my birthday last night. King crab on a succulent bed of grilled asparagus. Doesn't it look as though the crab wants to travel along on the little rolling green spears? Huh? It does too.

The salad was a halfbreed. Half Mexican, half Greek. Lots of tangy Greek olives, avocado, feta cheese, red onions, lemon, and Scott's superb home-made dressing.

This weekend we'll dig in to the set of DVDs he got for me (along with other cool stuff, including a bottle of my favorite perfume. I left my original bottle in Indiana.) The DVDs are documentaries. Because I'm very boring and I really wanted them. Because I'm dull.


  • At 3:36 PM, Blogger Jerry said…

    That dinner looks scrumpdillyishus. What you need to do is have a movie party. Invite your friends over and pick some movies to watch--then, if chosen, the selected friend has to create an alternative scene using a theme the group choses.

    They get a thumbs up or down on the quality of their performance. The audience can say things during the event like, "you bored me to death you asshole." Or, "that was so good I forgot to laugh." Fun stuff like that.

    If they really do a good job, you can untie their wife or companion and take the hood off their head. Wait, I forgot to tell you about that...

    Anyway, make sure you have some ropes and blindfolds. Hostages are released at the end of the night and you give them back their wallets and stuff.

    It's a lot of fun, but make sure you check everybody for weapons when they arrive, 'cause some people just don't have a sense of humor about food being thrown at them.

    I threw a party like that once but nobody came because I don't have any friends and I don't like them anyway.

    You should video tape your party then put it on YouTube, then write a book titled, "Party in the House of Pain," and make some big money.

    This is going to be a hell of a weekend.

  • At 3:40 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Well THAT beats the tar outta the Tupperware party I had planned. I'm totally down with it, and the alternative scene idea. And if they don't do an alternative scene, they have to do an interpretive dance with props like feather boas and small kitchen appliances.

    Oh, and I think you meant to say "Party in DA House of Pain."

    Since I have very few local friends so far, I'll have to make Lizzie the guest of honor. Though methinks her interpretive dance days are over.

  • At 4:26 PM, Blogger Jerry said…

    That's what I'm saying all up in here. And, an interpretive dance with props like feather boas and small kitchen appliances is like...genius.

    Yuh see, if we all lived in the same neighborhood, we could pitch a party that would get entertainment section coverage in the local paper and a lot of attention from the local policements.

    It ain't a good party unless it ends with mug shots and community service. Yuh know wha' I'm sa'in.

  • At 5:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Does Scott deliver north of 89th Street? That dinner looks like something out of Gourmet Magazine. And the wine? Something robust of course, but not overwhelming. Something with a definite nose. Nutty undertones of berries, and pronounced floral hints.

    Screw-top OK--I'm always forgetting to buy a corkscrew.

  • At 5:39 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    I'll put your order in right now, Tony.

    And whaddya mean "Screwtop OK." What other kind of wine IS there? I mean, unless you're uppity.

    We like to accessorize the crab with a nice Boone's Farm, or Mateus.

  • At 5:43 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Oh, and p.s. emails are bouncing back again. I'll keep trying.

  • At 6:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Thanks for the nice words, I wish I had more time to show off my fancy pants Kulinary Edjamukashin, but life is very full (and wonderful) regardless.

    Tony- for you, we deliver 24/7.

  • At 10:12 PM, Blogger Lisa Dunick said…

    Happy Birthday!!

  • At 10:59 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Thanks LD...isn't yours coming up? When is it?

  • At 1:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I don't understand what you mean about corks and screwtops for your wine....I thought wine came in a big box with a handy tap. Apparently, you don't know how to shop for wine!

    Even if Lizzie can't dance, I think she'd look smashing in a feather boa.

  • At 1:39 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Futuresis, them boxes is WAY too fancy.

    And Lizzie WOULD look smashing in a feather boa, if she weren't so, uh, smashed.

  • At 7:54 PM, Blogger Lisa Dunick said…

    It's tomorrow. But I don't think I get anything that good to eat.

  • At 9:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    What? No tuna fish on white bread with mayonnaise, a TAB and a couple of Twinkies?

  • At 11:14 AM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Hoosiermama...Get real! A COUPLE of Twinkies??? Seven. Seven Twinkies.
    But dang, you was close!

  • At 12:15 PM, Blogger Citlali said…

    Yeah? How about some Cold Duck or Riunity even. Now THAT will make any dinner classy, eh? lol. LOVE your guys' dinner ideas. That guy Jerry, what a riot. Didn't think you needed any of that kind of encouragement, Candy, but between the both of you the party concept really developed. And BTW, don't be knockin' the documentaries. I'll have you know that it may be the finishing touch you needed for the party... One of my faves is a documentary on ants and how there are Farmer ants that have livestock for milking (I am NOT kidding), gardener ants that cultivate their own plants, keep the land free of unwanted varieties, etc and a few other remarkable styles. Just IMAGINE what you could do with THAT theme at your party... hmmm. Me thinks it could be fantastic! = ]

  • At 12:33 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Oh my God. I have GOT to find that ant documentary! I love love love freaky documentaries. Thanks for the heads up. LIVESTOCK FOR MILKING??? AGGGGHHH!

  • At 9:49 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I recently watched a show about Army ants. Talk about FREAKY! I loved watching them race to build a bridge of out themselves so that the rest of the ants could cross back to their nest (I guess that's what you call where they live?) carrying a big scorpion that they killed.

    Wow....farmer ants. I'll have to look for that.

  • At 12:38 PM, Blogger Citlali said…

    Wow, no problem guys. I'll go home tonight and find the name of it. Think it was a Nova show. It was so totally awesome that it had to go in my collection. Anywho, I'll report back to you later on... = ]

  • At 12:44 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    EXCELLENT! Because I have to have that documentary. Thanks, Citlali!

  • At 7:04 PM, Blogger Unknown said…

    Happy Bird favorite documentary is The Wild Parrots of Telegraph Island. I want to marry that homeless parrot freak.

  • At 7:56 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Mary...I think I might've seen a few minutes of that somehow. It's ringing a bell. I must seek it out.

    You and I, we both like freaks. No offense, Scott.

  • At 8:59 PM, Blogger Citlali said…

    OMG! LOL. I've seen that documentary. He was really something. = ] Hey, sorry it took me so long to get back to you -- must be an ADD thing... So I found it. I have two of them but, my fav, the one w/the herder, horticulturist, gardener ants, etc. is NOVA. It's called: "Little Creatures Who Run the World" vhs is here - the one that I have:
    but it looks like they also have it in dvd and just put the word "Ants" in front of the title to differentiate -- it's got the same description and it's from the same year, 1995, so it's probably the same show.
    Seriously, it's freaken' awesome. Enjoy! = ]

  • At 10:21 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    YAY Citlali! I knew you'd be back! Thanks so much for finding that for us! I will definitely have to order it.

    You rock.


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