Candy Rant

"I killed a rat with a stick once."

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

No Actual Snakes Were Used in This Blog Post

I'm done with snakes. Let's pretend my mother has wiped them all from the face of the Earth. I won't mention snakes anymore.

Even though my gigantic pile of work is slithering its way through my psyche to devour my last BB-sized bit of sanity. And my sidewinding attempts to avoid a total breakdown have left me nothing but rattled.

Don't asp me if there's anything I can shed from my vast amount of work. There isn't. I tried. My fiance is very supportive and tells me to relax and take baby steps. And I say "Adder boy."

Sometimes to deal with the stress I eat lots of desserts. But if I eat too much cake or py-thon I won't be able to fit into my jeans. And of course there's the whole blood sugar thing I'm trying to control. But I don't want to boa you with that right now. Let's just say the diet constricts my choices of meals. Rats.

I am very very sleep deprived and now I have to go to the dentist. If you need to reach me, call me there. My dentist is a good guy. Eel let you know venom finished.


  • At 9:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dear Candyrant:
    I'm so glad you've stopped dreaming about snakes! Dr. Freud may find this fascinating, but I'm not a herpetologist.

    Now we have to work on this terrible problem you have with puns.
    Tony from the Bronx

  • At 9:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dealing in puns is a fangless job but someone has to do it.

  • At 10:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I like pie, anaconda ment called whipped cream.

  • At 11:53 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I got nothin'.

    Candy, what will you NOT do to avoid grading those papers?

    I'll read blogs to not grade. I read Candy's and Geoffrey Chaucer's (

  • At 1:58 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Tony, puns are not a problem. Admit it. You love them. You must go toward the light.
    No horsing around.
    It doesn't behoove you.

  • At 1:59 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    JWebb and Scott, How I love your shameless puns.
    I had to viper tears from my eyes.

  • At 1:59 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Chubby, Ain't it funny how I'm always gittin mistook for that Chosser?

  • At 10:16 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'm getting rattled! Puns are lower than a snake's navel, although it is true that I haven't been able to shed the habit myself. Isn't there an antidote to this python? (Sorry about the lisp.)
    Tony from the Bronx

  • At 10:26 PM, Blogger Candy Rant said…

    Yo, Tony from the Bronx. I've been trying to email you but I continue to be rejected. Fuhgeddaboudit.


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